Tubular Blues

Here at Custard HQ, I get the feeling that very few things actually bring down the mood and general buzz in the office. So what could possibly be at the top of the list for PR office bug bears? My theory……..the journey in! Not for the fear of the coming day, but that old devil called TFL (Transport for F*?”ing London).

Everyone would surely agree with me that the rush hour tube journey is not your friend. It was probably never your friend. In fact, I think I heard someone say it kind of hates you. But when I was pushing past the unwashed masses this morning my mind started to focus on all those little things I find myself doing in order to make that tube journey that little bit more bearable.

First thing to remember about the tube is that it’s all about getting the seat! There is a clear hierarchy of tube users and the people who have a seat are always at the top.
Everyone stares on with envy at the people who have seats, especially the ones who have to mould themselves into the door frame…hoping beyond hope that when that little alarm starts to ring that they wont have to take a hit from the doors. So to avoid getting thrust into the face of that ominous anorak-clad stranger, I would always attempt to strategically stand opposite people who I think are most likely to get off first (usually students and old people).

Another way people seem to keep their mind off the slow and torturous journey is with a little bit of full volume music and reading (preferably at the same time). This allows you to ignore all others around you, and avoids such awkward decisions as ‘should I give up my seat that that person who may not actually be pregnant or may not really be that old.’

Avoiding major hygiene risks is also another huge part of surviving the rush hour tube journey. Avoid at all costs (by subtly rotating towards someone else) the sneezing plague victims that you just know would rather hang onto the rails of the carriage than lift a hand to their mouth when they cough. A friend also informed me the other day that the hand rails on the tube have some frighteningly large percentage of human excrement on them........lovely.

Making the tube journey as brief as possible is always important, and as such, before I get on I always try and estimate where I need to be when I get off at my next stop. Usually this would only save seconds, but oh no, not in rush hour. If you get off the tube directly opposite that tunnel that leads to your next tube/ the way out, you can avoid that frustratingly slow moving penguin huddle around the entrance.

Anyway, blog venting over and back to the caffeinated joys of PR, as where would everyone actually be without that classic excuse “Sorry I’m late, the underground was really bad today” (nice little positive PR spin there.)